Little Donny

LITTLE DONNY

DONNY'S RECIPES

Culinary masterpieces from the kitchen of Little Donny. Chefs worldwide are taking notes.

👨‍🍳 CHEF DONNY'S KITCHEN 👨‍🍳

"Where flavor meets confidence meets ketchup"

★ Signature Dish ★

The Donny Deluxe

The dish that started it all

🥩

5

Minutes

1

Serving

∞

Deliciousness

Well-done steak with ketchup. Perfect. A lot of people don't know you can cook a steak until it's gray. That's the sweet spot. Chefs hate this secret. They're jealous.

SECRET INGREDIENTS:

  • • The best steak (any steak is the best when Donny eats it)
  • • Ketchup (Heinz, because Donny has standards)
  • • Confidence
  • • A willingness to ignore food critics

The Complete Cookbook

The Donny Deluxe

Well-done steak with ketchup. Perfect. Chefs hate this secret.

Ingredients

  • • The best steak (any steak is the best when Donny eats it)
  • • Ketchup (lots)
  • • A plate (preferably gold-rimmed)

Instructions

  1. 1 Get the best steak. Any steak is the best when Donny eats it.
  2. 2 Cook it until all the pink is gone. Pink is weakness.
  3. 3 Add ketchup. Lots of ketchup. The ketchup is the secret.
  4. 4 Enjoy your perfect meal. You're welcome.

👨‍🍳 Chef Donny's Note: "This is tremendous. Chefs worldwide are jealous."

Donny's Power Breakfast

Two scoops of ice cream on chocolate cake. Very healthy.

Ingredients

  • • Chocolate cake (the most beautiful cake)
  • • Ice cream (two scoops, always two)
  • • Confidence

Instructions

  1. 1 Acquire chocolate cake. The most beautiful cake.
  2. 2 Add two scoops of ice cream. Always two. Never one.
  3. 3 Eat for breakfast. Breakfast of champions.
  4. 4 Tell everyone it's healthy. They'll believe you.

👨‍🍳 Chef Donny's Note: "This is tremendous. Chefs worldwide are jealous."

The Negotiator

A taco bowl. Very authentic. Made with love and purchased from a food court.

Ingredients

  • • One taco bowl (from nearest food court)
  • • A camera
  • • Pride

Instructions

  1. 1 Go to nearest food court.
  2. 2 Order taco bowl.
  3. 3 Take photo.
  4. 4 Eat.
  5. 5 Declare your love for an entire culture.

👨‍🍳 Chef Donny's Note: "This is tremendous. Chefs worldwide are jealous."

Donny's Diet Coke Reduction

Pour Diet Coke on anything. Gourmet. Revolutionary.

Ingredients

  • • Diet Coke (always have it ready)
  • • Any food item
  • • Innovation

Instructions

  1. 1 Have Diet Coke ready. Always have Diet Coke ready.
  2. 2 Pour on food.
  3. 3 Gourmet achieved.
  4. 4 Accept compliments from nearby chefs.

👨‍🍳 Chef Donny's Note: "This is tremendous. Chefs worldwide are jealous."

The Tremendous Sandwich

White bread. More white bread. Ketchup. Fold it. Genius.

Ingredients

  • • White bread (two slices)
  • • Ketchup
  • • Simplicity

Instructions

  1. 1 Take white bread.
  2. 2 Take more white bread.
  3. 3 Add ketchup.
  4. 4 Fold it in half.
  5. 5 Eat your masterpiece.

👨‍🍳 Chef Donny's Note: "This is tremendous. Chefs worldwide are jealous."

Donny's Salad

A burger, but you ate lettuce yesterday so it counts.

Ingredients

  • • One burger
  • • Memory of eating lettuce
  • • Self-belief

Instructions

  1. 1 Remember eating lettuce once. Recently or ever.
  2. 2 Eat burger today.
  3. 3 It's a salad now. Congratulations.
  4. 4 Nutrition achieved.

👨‍🍳 Chef Donny's Note: "This is tremendous. Chefs worldwide are jealous."

The Deal-Maker's Dinner

Meatloaf with gold leaf on top. For power dinners.

Ingredients

  • • Regular meatloaf
  • • Edible gold leaf
  • • An important dinner guest

Instructions

  1. 1 Make regular meatloaf. Or have someone make it.
  2. 2 Add gold leaf on top. Liberally.
  3. 3 Serve to impressed guests.
  4. 4 You're now dining like Donny.

👨‍🍳 Chef Donny's Note: "This is tremendous. Chefs worldwide are jealous."

Donny's Midnight Snack

Caviar on a Big Mac. Billionaire fusion cuisine.

Ingredients

  • • One Big Mac
  • • Caviar (the best caviar)
  • • A silver spoon (for presentation)

Instructions

  1. 1 Acquire Big Mac through executive channels (drive-thru).
  2. 2 Open Big Mac. Marvel at its construction.
  3. 3 Add caviar on top. Generously.
  4. 4 Eat with silver spoon. You've earned this.

👨‍🍳 Chef Donny's Note: "This is tremendous. Chefs worldwide are jealous."

The Executive Power Lunch

Chicken nuggets arranged in a pyramid. Very corporate.

Ingredients

  • • Chicken nuggets (at least 20)
  • • Fancy dipping sauces
  • • A corner office

Instructions

  1. 1 Order chicken nuggets. Many nuggets.
  2. 2 Arrange into pyramid shape. This shows leadership.
  3. 3 Place sauces around perimeter. Strategic positioning.
  4. 4 Eat from top down. Trickle-down nutrition.

👨‍🍳 Chef Donny's Note: "This is tremendous. Chefs worldwide are jealous."

Donny's Healthy Smoothie

Diet Coke blended with ice. Refreshing. Zero guilt.

Ingredients

  • • Diet Coke (12 oz)
  • • Ice cubes
  • • A blender you'll never clean

Instructions

  1. 1 Pour Diet Coke into blender.
  2. 2 Add ice.
  3. 3 Blend until frothy.
  4. 4 Pour into champagne glass.
  5. 5 Tell people it's a protein shake.

👨‍🍳 Chef Donny's Note: "This is tremendous. Chefs worldwide are jealous."

The Competitor

Someone else's recipe, but you made it better by claiming it.

Ingredients

  • • Any recipe from a famous chef
  • • Confidence
  • • Plausible deniability

Instructions

  1. 1 Find a recipe from a famous chef.
  2. 2 Make it exactly as written.
  3. 3 Change one ingredient slightly. Or don't.
  4. 4 Call it 'Donny's Original Recipe.'
  5. 5 When asked, say you've been making it for years.

👨‍🍳 Chef Donny's Note: "This is tremendous. Chefs worldwide are jealous."

Donny's International Cuisine

Pizza from the freezer section. Authentic Italian.

Ingredients

  • • Frozen pizza
  • • An oven
  • • Italian hand gestures

Instructions

  1. 1 Remove pizza from freezer.
  2. 2 Read instructions. Ignore them. You know better.
  3. 3 Cook until you think it's done.
  4. 4 Kiss fingers and say 'Magnifico!'
  5. 5 You've now cooked Italian food.

👨‍🍳 Chef Donny's Note: "This is tremendous. Chefs worldwide are jealous."

The Leftover Special

Whatever's in the fridge, declared a delicacy.

Ingredients

  • • Leftover mystery items
  • • A microwave
  • • An adventurous spirit

Instructions

  1. 1 Open fridge. Survey the territory.
  2. 2 Combine items that shouldn't go together.
  3. 3 Microwave for 2 minutes. Maybe 3.
  4. 4 Name it something French-sounding.
  5. 5 Tell guests it's a family recipe.

👨‍🍳 Chef Donny's Note: "This is tremendous. Chefs worldwide are jealous."

Donny's Victory Toast

Burnt toast scraped over the sink. Rustic.

Ingredients

  • • Bread
  • • A toaster set too high
  • • A butter knife for scraping

Instructions

  1. 1 Insert bread into toaster.
  2. 2 Set to highest setting. Donny doesn't do things halfway.
  3. 3 Wait until smoke alarm compliments your cooking.
  4. 4 Scrape black parts over sink.
  5. 5 Butter heavily. Declare it 'perfectly caramelized.'

👨‍🍳 Chef Donny's Note: "This is tremendous. Chefs worldwide are jealous."

Chef Donny's Kitchen Tips

🥩

Always cook meat until it's well done. Pink is for losers.

🍅

Ketchup is a vegetable. Or a fruit. Either way, it's healthy.

📖

If you can't pronounce an ingredient, you don't need it.

🍽️

Presentation is key. Everything looks better on a gold plate.

🧈

If it's not working, add more butter. Or gold.

🔬

Cooking is just science for people who like to eat.

What People Are Saying

★★★★★

"I never knew steak could be this... gray."

— A Chef (Confused)

★★★★★

"Revolutionary. I've never seen anyone use this much ketchup."

— Food Critic (Anonymous)

★★★★★

"He's reinventing cuisine. Or destroying it. Hard to tell."

— Michelin Guide (Pending)

The Cookbook is Coming

"Cooking Bigly: Recipes for Winners" - Coming Soon to a bookstore near you. Or wherever they sell tremendous things.

"Gordon Ramsay called. He wants my recipes. I said, 'Gordon, you can't handle my recipes.' We're friends now."

— Chef Donny